Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
we're so committed to being not committed
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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