It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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