i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
