My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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