Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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