HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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