doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
