I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
