i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
