I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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