I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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