I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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