i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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