Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
