is your mom at the bar?
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
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