At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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