If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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