I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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