I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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