You can't motorboat a personality
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
