what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Randomize
