You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
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so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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