how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
