Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
