When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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