Me too!
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
