So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize