Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
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