i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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