turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Randomize
