Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
