Where did you get a picture of my penis
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
