With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Randomize
