Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
