I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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