Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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