My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
