I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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