But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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