Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
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so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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