Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
