Its about making memories worth repressing
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
