There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize