it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
