Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
