He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
