so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
