kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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