eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
