I just saw a hot homeless man
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
